What Do The People In My Dreams Mean?

Everybody in your dreams represents a part of you, whether the character is someone known to you or a stranger.  I refer to this as the first circle of interpretation.  Because we so often dream of people close to us, there is a second circle of meaning when someone plays a role in our dreams.  Through the second circle, the dreamer can reflect directly upon the life circumstances connected to the person making the appearance.  Both perspectives merit exploration and are powerful inroads to information.

The work that I do interpreting the dreams of others never utilizes the second circle, primarily because unless I am working with them as an ongoing client, I rarely have enough information or time to investigate the relationships of the person I’m working with.  Both circles can yield remarkable information and every dreamer can work with both; however I strongly encourage the former over the later.  It is far easier to confront frustrations in your relationships than to face taking responsibility for your self and your actions.

As an example, a man dreams that his wife insists on driving him to the dentist.  She is far more outgoing than he, representing the gregarious parts of him in his dream.  This dreamer is being called by the disowned part of himself that cries out to be incorporated into his communication (teeth, mouth), despite the fears that might accompany such a shift (disliking going to the dentist).  His outgoing wife represents the part of him that can speak his mind.  She also represents that part of himself that can facilitate the inner work that will make the shift possible (her driving).

The dream serves the dual purpose of pointing out that the dreamer is not speaking his own truth enough.  In the first circle, his wife is his inner character aspect of assertiveness.  In the second circle, the dream points to the dreamer’s frustration at his wife’s demands for control of the relationship.  Both avenues of investigation are important, however doing the inner work will automatically shift the outer experience.


By now you should have a clear understanding of the technique of seeing everyone that appears in your dreams as a part of you, the dreamer.  Here is the way out of that process being confusing, especially when you are dreaming of friends, family members, loved ones or other associates.

It is so difficult not to see these people as the separate whole beings you know them to be.  If you dream about your partner, you will be inundated with all of their quirks and qualities when trying to identify what part of you they represent.  Simply ask yourself to mention the first three adjectives that come to mind when you think of the person in question.

For example, there was a particular graduate school professor of mine that I would describe as self conscious, awkward and inept.  Dreaming of him puts me in the realm of my own incompetence.  My closest friend is ridiculously aware and insightful, but can be brutal in expressing his opinions (aware, insightful and brutal).  If he shows up in my nighttime story land, it is the part of me that uses a sledgehammer to make a point that is being highlighted.

This exercise must be done with a sense of impulsivity and lack of self consciousness, often difficult to execute when you know why you’re doing it.  It works wonders when I spring it on a client, but it can be just as impactful when you know it’s coming (as in doing it yourself) as long as you approach it with authenticity and integrity.

Have at it!

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15 Responses to What Do The People In My Dreams Mean?

  1. Tam Nguyen August 9, 2012 at 6:37 am #

    Why do I often dream my mother who passed away 6 months ago? Does my mother want to tell me something?


  2. mlennox August 9, 2012 at 12:08 pm #

    This is very common, to dream of someone who has just passed and reflects the connection we have to all life, even when the appearance is that life has ended. My experience tells me that your mother is not necessarily trying to communicate something specific to you per se, but rather just expressing the connection we have that goes beyond the boundaries of life. My suggestion is to enjoy the dreams if you can.

  3. steven palmer March 13, 2013 at 2:00 am #

    these people were walkig down the staiweel some sort of meeting i was abuot to say somethgin someone intervened it was old dugenon area i was yelling back at the group you are a bunch of contrrol freaks and gurus peope alway are in my dreams where are thise plwaces if at all how does one observe and participate simultaneoululy the meanign of the dream just arose it always of often does when one writes it out

  4. kboom May 27, 2013 at 8:05 am #

    been dreaming out someone who i liked we were goner get married at one point but ,family complications etc, and its been 2 years since, but every iv been seeing her a lot in my dreams. i still have abit of feeling but im more curious to know what she thinks as i haven’t spoke to her about anything

  5. molly April 28, 2016 at 3:21 pm #

    i had my mother die when i was 8 years old now i am 13 and it is still very diffucult. why do i still see her in my dreams??

  6. mlennox April 28, 2016 at 4:25 pm #

    When people pass away and visit the living in their dreams, it is evidence of the very real connection between the two worlds. I invite you to consider your mother appearing in your dreams is because there is still a very powerful energetic connection even though she is no longer in this dimension!

  7. Julybug May 3, 2016 at 2:10 pm #

    Why do I always dream of a boy in my class whom I never talked to. Most of the time I see him in the hallways or everywhere I go.

  8. Sandy May 31, 2016 at 10:14 pm #

    I dreamt of one of my colleague to whom I’m attracted as coming to my home to rob things with his friends. But after he sees me he realises that he didn’t come to rob the things and he waits for me at the doorstep till I see him again and suddenly it starts raining but he doesn’t care about that, he just waits for me. Then my dad came inside the house and stares at me and I went to tell him to leave but instead I hug him after seeing his eyes n start crying on his shoulders n chest. What does this dream because I’m so confused about the feelings I’m having right now towards anyone and anything. Please help me!

  9. Angelina June 3, 2016 at 9:28 pm #

    I’ve dreamed my best friend overdosed on a couch in the rv she was in pain and in tears it was weird cause I felt her pain emotionality and physically like it was real then I told her about my dream she told me she almost overdose in a rv what does that mean

  10. jon June 25, 2016 at 2:35 am #

    A friend of mine died nearly 2 years ago. I never got say goodbye to her. She visits my dreams once in a while. In one visit she and I kissed and it very real does that mean anything

  11. Max September 7, 2016 at 11:50 pm #

    what happens to the people in your dream that act upon you but in reality, there just a stranger?

  12. Yailynn October 10, 2016 at 2:10 am #

    I dreamed of the name of a prehistoric creature its called a pikaia but i dont understand why or what its trying to tell me.

  13. Yailynn October 10, 2016 at 2:23 am #

    Its a way that someone in your life is watting for you to come.

  14. Anonymous October 13, 2016 at 9:50 am #

    It started with me having sex with this gorgeous 18yo girl. A day later I seen she killed herself. All of a sudden im this 13yo girl and I am having sex with someone I tricked into thinking I was 18. I look in the mirror and I am the same girl I was having sex with before. I hang myself.

    This dream was so lucid that when I woke up after after, I was confused and felt raped.

  15. Lauren November 21, 2016 at 3:09 pm #

    I had a dream about 2 of my crushes, 2 of my other guy friends. We were all decorating a part of a wall for Christmas at my middle school. We were all having a competition to see who could get there first. My two crushes won,and I came in third. We all just decorated the wall had a good time. I have no clue what this means, and if someone could be great!